Thursday, 13 June 2013

Hope for the Hopeless

What do you do when you are told that this might be as good as it gets?  What about all your hopes and dreams?

I am talking about my niece, her mental health has once again deteriorated very quickly, she is harming herself worse than she has ever done during this 6 month admission.  Three weeks ago we were planning her discharge as she was doing so well. 

I have sat in a meeting with all the 'professionals' caring for her for two hours this afternoon.  The general consensus appears to be that this could well be as good as it gets.  REALLY? FOREVER?

My heart is broken enough from all the losses that have driven her to the place where she is, how on earth can I keep it from shattering completely?  It isn't even just an emotional pain that I feel anymore, my heart actually aches so that it catches my breath.

I cannot possibly accept this is as good as it gets surely?  Where is my hope in a God that heals, whose heart is for the broken and the orphaned?  Do I accept what they say and so start to guard my heart from the pain that it is going to have to continue to endure for her?  Or can my God give me the strength to stand firm, to endure the pain and to hope eternally?

I so HOPE it is the later,  shortly after she stopped living with us I did much of the guarding myself from the pain.  I managed it for about 12 months before the cracks in this plan became to deep that the pain started to spill.  I then had to give up work because of the deterioration in my health.  I do not want to go there again.

I guess all I can do at the moment is make this my prayer and have that same HOPE.

2 Chronicles 14:10-12

Good News Translation (GNT)
10 Asa went out to fight him, and both sides took up their positions at Zephathah Valley near Mareshah. 11 Asa prayed to the Lord his God, “O Lord, you can help a weak army as easily as a powerful one. Help us now, O Lord our God, because we are relying on you, and in your name we have come out to fight against this huge army. Lord, you are our God; no one can hope to defeat you.”12 The Lord defeated the Ethiopian army when Asa and the Judean army attacked them. They fled,


  1. Jane, I am so very sorry about your niece. She does appear to be in a dreadful state at present.
    I am no kind of expert but I do know that it is not up to you to carry this burden, on top of all your other sorrows.
    There is a world of difference between being strong and being superhuman.
    Never give up all hope, but do for once, put yourself first.
    Hearts do not break. They bend, and chip, and bits fall off, but they are very resilient organs.
    I wish I could relieve you of some of your pain, but I can't, and neither can any other human being.
    Offer it to God, ask for his help (for yourself as well as for your niece), and try to rest.
    Love and blessings. X

  2. I wish that there was something that could fix things. I wish I could say something that didn't sound trite. I have hope that whilst your niece may never be fully recovered, I hope that she is able to find peace and stability without the need to self harm. We're all on the same path, it's just some of us have shoes that don't help. Much love to you xx

  3. Much love. Everything has been said more eloquently than I could ever put it, just know that I am here when ever you need an ear/shoulder xxxx